Disclaimer: the photo isn’t related to the content, but the Sky was really beautiful today. .
Talk time, since I don’t usually express my thoughts or talk about it with others, I tend to share it like this. If people read it, then it’s okay, welcome to my complicated life, if not, you’re not missing much lol. I mainly write these things so that after a couple of months I can tell how much I have changed and how things have turned out in general. .
Since classes will start in like, next next week(?), now I’m kind of having self doubt more. Can I do this, will it be easy? How can I manage this whole thing. While thinking like this, there is the other side of me telling me: you can do this. I mean, I did really well on my BA, I even graduated as an honorary student who ranked 1st among 69students. For the language part, I have always wanted to discover and learn more. So this will be the best time to learn enthusiastically! And in the end, I have always wanted to complete my MA, so instead of worrying before going through this, I should just focus on the learning part, and can have my worries on spot. It will not be easy, that’s for sure, but I believed in myself for like 28 years (mainly the recent years because before, I was kinda clown) but still, how different can this be.
The second thing is, the ‘acquaintance’ part. I have always did things on my own, on my way, without needing others’ support or attention. However, for some time, I have always wanted to feel accepted by others. I don’t know why, but I think I should just, get myself together and get back the way I was. More confident in myself, without needing other people to be by my side to tell me that I’m doing well( Well, this part doesn’t apply to the 5 closest people I know in Korea, you guys are the best and I’m really thankful for everything you do for me! I hope that I can repay the kindness you showed me one day. BESTEST PEOPLE).
In conclusion, I am me, I don’t need to feel accepted or needed by others. Life goes on, and grow more :) let’s make this experience worth it, Kinda!